The Sexual Health Chronicles: Spice up the Bedroom with Toys

Sex toys are fun. Is there a better reason for trying them out? Perhaps your time in the bedroom isn't what it was in the beginning. Maybe you're simply curious about the hype surrounding sexual toys. It's also possible that you want to fulfill some secret fantasy that wouldn't be possible without a sex toy. Whatever the reason, one thing is certain about incorporating toys into your intimate life: things will get spicier because new is exciting.

Why Some People Are Reluctant About Using Sexual Toys

While the thought of using sex toys can really make some people's hearts race, others aren't so sure about the idea. Some individuals might perceive using objects for arousal to be unnatural or even taboo. Many men see dildos and vibrators as competition with uncanny size and stamina--and that intimidates them. They're afraid that their partners will develop unrealistic performance expectations after getting used to battery-powered toys. There are also individuals out there who question the safety of putting foreign objects into very private areas. It's also possible that certain sexual toys are too pricey for many people's tastes, or that being unfamiliar with the vast selection of sexual implements and their operation can be quite off-putting. The list goes on, but unless you're completely against the idea of experimenting with them, it's worth giving it a shot to see how things pan out. Your initial impressions could change very quickly.

Take Your Intimacy to the Next Level

If you currently find intercourse to be boring or can't seem to climax anymore, it's obvious that being intimate doesn't arouse you as much as it should. Toys can change all of that if you're willing to try.

Sexuality isn't just a physical matter. It also has everything to do with the mind. Trying something new and unfamiliar can be extremely arousing for many couples. Frankly, that's why people are so prone to cheating. It's the idea of being with a complete stranger and having a brand new experience with that individual that's so exhilarating. Of course, cheating on each other is the last thing that a committed couple would ever want or think of doing. Toys, however, can have the same thrilling effect on a couple's dying relationship.

The Best Toys for Couples Just Getting Into It

If both you and your partner are on the same boat about playing, you're going to have to stop by a toy store to stock up on goodies. Here are a few common toy types that might strike your fancy.

> Dildo

Dildos are phallic objects made from a soft plastic material. They're the most basic of bedroom implements and must be manually operated by the individual receiving or giving. Dildos come in all shapes, sizes, and colors, so select a form that both partners find to be pleasing.

> Vibrator

The vibrator is a toy that creates vibrations when activated by a switch or remote control. Vibrators may also come in phallic shapes, but they can also exist in various different forms from finger pads and "bullets" to things that are more complex. Originally designed as a woman's private companion, vibrators are inserted into the vagina and may also include a part for stimulating the clitoris.

> Penis Ring

The penis ring is usually a stretchy band that slides down the shaft of a penis to the base. It also vibrates and stimulates both the male and female partner during intercourse.

> Anal Beads

Couples interested in back door fun could find much enjoyment in using anal beads--plastic spheres of varying sizes attached to a string. The spheres are inserted into the anus one at a time and are meant to cause sexual arousal during both insertion and pull-out.

Have some fun and take good care of yourself!

Healthy Sex Chronicles Part I: 4Play All Day Long

You've probably heard that good foreplay is the secret to great sex. Well, it's true, but foreplay doesn't just refer to the brief fondling that occurs minutes before intercourse. Experts believe that it also includes every suggestive action that occurs throughout the day between partners before leading up to sex. Keeping your partner primed for what's to come is the surest way to have him or her begging for the big finale.

Why does all-day foreplay work?

Imagine that you're cooking steaks for dinner. Would you rather throw it on a skillet right away, or would you prefer to let it marinade in an awesome blend of spices overnight before savoring it? The latter obviously sounds more appealing, right? The same reasoning applies to sex. Foreplay is the marinade that makes everything taste so much better.

The power of suggestion is one that's very hard to resist. Foreplay is all about suggestion. Doing little things here and there to entice your partner over the course of the day is the way to build up carnal desires. Sex is as much a mental game as it is a physical one. The brain is an amazing thing, and without thinking about sex beforehand, the sexual activity wouldn't be nearly as enjoyable as it could be. When your partner is lusting for your touch, the level of arousal that he or she feels when you both finally make contact will be seriously magnified. That's exactly what you want.

What can I do to tease my partner?

There are many ways to wet your partner's sexual appetite. On the day that you plan to get freaky, here's what you can do.

> Give your significant other a juicy smooch before heading off to work

Instead of the typical peck on the cheek, use your lips and tongue with this one. Take your time, and don't be afraid to ruin your lipstick. You can always reapply it.

> Leave a sexy note in your partner's purse or briefcase

There are few surprises more pleasant than letting your partner know what you want to do to him or her after work. Sticky notes carefully placed in pants pockets, wallets, or even on a laptop screen should do the trick.

> Send each other "sexts" throughout the day

Sexy text messages will surely have your significant other yearning for more after you've stimulated that mind repeatedly.

> Surprise your partner by sending seductive photos over email

Like they say, pictures are worth a thousand words. In this case, risqué self-shots could be worth the best sexual experience you've ever had.

Enjoy and take good care of yourself!

Blood Type Key to Wellness and Weight Loss

Obesity and weight loss. These words have the power to strike a chord of dread even in the most fearless of people. Most people at some point in their lives have tried some type of “diet” that may work in the short-term, but more than likely has very little to zero long-term benefits.

The reasons that most weight loss programs do not work in the long-term are varied. There are not very many people who can sustain themselves very long on a cabbage soup diet or a plan that strictly prohibits you from eating a variety of different foods. People are not wired that way. To top it all off, the recommendation is to engage in some form of moderate to intense exercise program. The problem with this is that if a person has not had proper nourishment, there is positively no way that any type of exercise program is going to happen, let alone be successful. Just imagine this scenario: You have been eating cabbage soup for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Now, you are supposed to work out at an intense enough rate to keep your heart rate up, as well as strength training. You probably barely had enough strength just to make it through your day after your healthy” cabbage soup "meals." Exercising is not going to be an option because you are just too beat to do anything more than what you absolutely have to do. This whole scene is discouraging and is a setup for failure.

To make matters even worse, when you go to see your doctor and he or she advises you that you need to need to eat better to improve your health. You then ask the usual questions, but mainly you want to know how to lose the excess pounds for your overall wellness. Your physician then proceeds to tell you that the only way to shed those excess pounds is through vigorous exercise and calorie restriction. You try to explain to your doctor that you have already been on that ride, did not find it fun, and could he please advise something better for you. His reply is probably going to be to tell you to just stick with it. Your mind is screaming, “Are you kidding me right now?”

Being obese has many negative health implications. The most obvious of these is that obesity is not physically attractive. Everyone wants to be able to look and feel his or her best. This does not necessarily mean that you have to be excessively thin, as that has its own set of problems. However, achieving numbers that are suitable for your age and gender is ideal and reaching your goal may not be as difficult as you previously thought.

Losing extra pounds with the blood type program could possibly be the answer to you finally getting to your ideal goal. I recently read Eat 4 Your Blood Type, developed by naturopathic physician, Dr. Peter D’Adamo. The basic way that this works is by finding out your type, A, B, O, or AB. Once your type has been determined, you are given an eating plan that is both satisfying and nourishing.

Blood Type Weight Loss

The blood type weight loss plan addresses individuals and does not assign a one-size-fits-all type of “diet” to everyone. This plan is really tailored to an individual person's needs at the cellular level. It addresses things such as allergies, disease susceptibility, food combining, etc. Once you know your blood type, you will know which foods will specifically help you to lose body fat safely and effectively. Another bonus to Dr. D’Adamo’s plan is that you do not have to wait for a long period of time before you start to see results. Many have seen results in as little as two weeks. Remember the strenuous exercise program that was discussed earlier? This plan even addresses that. Based on your type, you may be pleasantly surprised to find that the exercise plan that you need may not be as difficult or as time-consuming as you had been previously told by other physicians.

A person with a Type A blood is likely to predisposed to diseases such as heart disease and cancer. Therefore, these types should concentrate on eating foods that are organic. An eating plan that is rich in organic fruits and vegetables is best. Type A’s prefer exercises such as tai chi and yoga for calmness and centering.

Someone who is Type B has a very strong digestive and immune system. Also, someone who is type B, tends to be more resistant to chronic illnesses. These types best benefit from moderate exercise like hiking and tennis.

Type O people tend to respond well to intense physical activity like running, martial arts, and contact sports. Foods rich in animal proteins work best, while grains and dairy tend to contribute to gaining excess pounds. Gluten is a major contributor of weight gain in Type O.

Those who are type AB are more biologically complex. A combination of both the A and B program is well-suited to them.

If you or someone that you know is obese, Dr. D’Adamo’s plan may be just what you need to improve your overall health and wellness. Doing so will lead you to a healthier, happier, and more vital life. Hey, I started following the plan for a Bloody Type A and I'm 10 lbs down in less than 2 weeks! 

Take good care of yourself!

Thoughts = Life

A few months ago I ran across a coupon for a group hypnosis class for weight loss. I've tried practically every diet out there so why not add this one to the list. Well to my disappointment I didn't get reprogrammed to hate carbs as I had initially hoped. I did however get some much needed instructor-led meditation along with the following message repeated throughout the session. "Be careful what you say to yourself because yourself is listening." That concept really resonated with me. The average person can have more than ten thousand thoughts in one day and majority of those thoughts are negative. Have you ever listened to your self-talk...the thoughts running wild in your head?

• "Why did I do that? I'm so stupid"
• "I'm fat/wide/ugly/too skinny" 
• "I can't do [fill in the blank]"
• "I wish I had his/her [fill in the blank]"

OR

• "I'm so tired"
• "I don't have the money"
• "I'm stuck in this position"
• "I'll never be/have [fill in goals]"
• "Things never go right for me"

It's so easy to be critical of self, but ironically you wouldn't speak to a close friend or loved one in this manner so why do we tear ourselves down? After the hypnosis class I started to pay more attention to my thoughts. I learned that I am extremely hard on myself and impatient. At 35 I am just recognizing that my thoughts and words are little seeds that I am constantly planting in my life. I think, "I'm tired"...my body responds by sitting on the couch for hours at a time. I think, "I don't know as much as my colleague"... my confidence shrivels and I don't speak up in the meeting. I think, "my stomach looks huge"...I now struggle to believe and accept the compliments from my husband.

Okay, so the class didn't prevent me from loving bread and pasta, but it did so much more. It made me conscious of the power of my thoughts. I can control my thoughts. My attitude towards life and ultimately my happiness are within me. From now on I'm planting positive seeds. I'm only depositing GOOD STUFF in this body - physically and mentally. Just like Being Mary Jane, I started leaving post-it notes all over the house with positive affirmations and reminders to be kind and patient with myself.

A couple of books are helping me through the journey to absolute self-love. There are tons of resources on the subject. My favorite are the Hay House books. Louise Hay is the queen of the feel-good!



Take good care of yourself.

Am I hoarder?

I was preparing to make a little masterpiece in the kitchen today. I pulled out all my ingredients to make a bacon carbonara pasta dish (I know and I don't even want to hear it) and that's when I noticed the expiration date on the parsley container. 05MAR11. Yes, I was and have been using some freakishly old seasoning. As much as I detested throwing out my three-quarter full container, I knew it was for the best. Then I went on to review all of my spices. Do you know I threw out more than 15 containers, large and small. Then I started going through my baking ingredients and found myself ditching flour, vanilla extract bottles, and even cookie sprinkles. My whole dang kitchen was OLD. I couldn't believe it. Now at this point the spring cleaning spirit was in me and was running around the house tossing anything that remotely looked dusty into trash bags. I reviewed every item in the pantry, and the refrigerator. At the end of my cleaning rampage I threw out more than 4 tall trash bags of condiments, spices, pasta, popcorn, jello, vitamins, over-the-counter and prescription drugs (except for my Vicodin and Percocet...I would never throw out the good stuff), and hair and skin products. But seriously when is the last time you did an inventory of your kitchen, your medicine cabinet, your makeup bag, and under your sink? A lot, if not all, of these articles have an expiration date. When it comes to perishable foods it is easy to tell when they go bad because they usually develop mold or have a foul order. It's harder to tell when seasonings or processed food go bad because they might look and taste okay. Truth is when you go past the "Best by or Use by" date, the food's nutritional value decreases and the taste may not be as tasty as it once was. Likewise with medicine, it's best to throw out old vitamins and drugs as they lose their potency after the expiration date and what's worse they could potentially cause illnesses or other conditions. Unlike food, cosmetics may not display an expiration date, however, they go bad just the same. Old cosmetics can cause eye infections and skin blemishes. As a tip, when you buy a new cosmetic item immediately mark it with the date purchased with a marker. Did you know mascara goes bad at around 3-4 months? When's the last time you switched out that basic beauty item? Check out the guidelines for the basic types of make up products. 

Product	Toss it after. . .
Mascara	3 - 4 months
Concealer	12 months
Water-based Foundation	12 months
Oil-based Foundation	18 months
Blush or bronzer	18 months
Cream blush	18 months
Eye shadow	3 years
Pencil Eyeliner	3 months
Powder	2 years
Lipstick/lip gloss	18 months
Lip liner	12 months
Nail polish	12 months
Makeup sponges	Wash weekly,discard monthly

So let the spring cleaning spirits be with you so that you can prevent any illnesses or at the very least not be featured on an episode of Hoarders.

Take good care of yourself. 

A Fruitcake....no a Fruitarian? Oh I see!

I'll take the fruitcake on this one. So apparently Ashton Kutcher who is playing Steve Jobs in the upcoming biopic jOBS,  immersed himself into the role so much so that he adopted Steve Jobs' fruitarian lifestyle. Quick study: Fruitarianism is the practice of only eating fruits, seeds and nuts. Some die hard fruities will only eat fruit that has fallen from the tree because they don't want to harm the tree or plant. Yes, this is for real. It's hippee gone to heaven, literally. Apple founder and genius, Jobs, died of pancreatic cancer and Kutcher eerily landed himself in the hospital doubled over in pain from this diet with his "pancreatic levels out of whack." The moral of this story is moderation. And for the record I do hate the term "moderation" or maybe I fear it. I have addictive tendencies and don't want to admit to myself that I will have to police my eating habits for the rest of my life. From the high-protein, no carb Atkins diet to the master cleanse lemonade diet, ....I am the queen of extreme diets because I am the D student when it comes to balance and *arrgh* m-o-d-e-r-a-t-i-o-n. I will let Ashton Kutcher and Steve Jobs be a lesson to me and anyone in the same boat that extreme diets can cause major harm to your body. I've never ended up in the hospital in pain from a diet, but carrying around yo-yo diet pounds all day, every day is like living in a casket. Okay that was depressing...but it's real deal holyfield here. So one more time for the road. M-O-D-E-R-A-T-I-O-N

Take good care of yourself!

Stress@work

I'm back!! Took some time off from blogging but I'm rested and ready to talk. So let's get to it.

There's a lot in the news these days about mental health, wellness and the impact of stress on the mind and body. Job stress can be the worst especially in this unstable economy. Most of us carry a certain amount of work stress and we cope with it by engaging in good and bad activities. Some of us exercise (GOOD) and some of us drink our problems away (BAD)...but I'm not pointing fingers at what you do to get by.  I just refuse to believe that merely getting by should be the norm. Well here's what my daddy told me when I was just knee-high to a grasshopper. He said to get relief from stress on your job...get a second job! I don't care if you are an attorney by day and have a paper route on the weekends. My daddy's thinking is that having multiple streams of income actually helps you sleep better at night. Not just because you are tired as heck from working "10 jobs mon" but because you know that you are no longer completely dependent on ONE paycheck. Even if you are only making chump change on your side hustle, the point is your self confidence is boosted because you know you have other skills and means to fall back on or could potentially grow into a primary source of income if you ever lost your main job. People that have multiple streams of income tend to be more creative and offer more "out of the box" solutions to their company's problems and show more initiative. Why? These self-starters are not afraid of making a mistake. They know to succeed you have to fail but you have something to fall back on if things got tough. Hey, if you don't want to believe my daddy, you can believe God. 

Ecclesiastes 11:6

Plant your seed in the morning and keep busy all afternoon, for you don’t know if profit will come from one activity or another—or maybe both.

Free your mind from work stresses. It may go along way for your career endeavors and your overall health and well being. 

Take good care of yourself.